We've all heard it. That little voice inside your head saying 'You don't deserve to be here. You don't belong here. They're giving you way too much credit for this. You're going to be found out...'
In an Insta poll ahead of this post over 90% of respondents said they'd experienced imposter syndrome. People told us they’d struggled with it for years; some said on a daily basis it ‘crushed their confidence’ and that they push themselves to appear more confident - ‘fake it til you make it’ - than they actually feel.
And I know from personal experience the damage it can do. When I started my pattern company I was really anxious about promoting it in any way because I was convinced people would say I shouldn’t be releasing patterns because I wasn't formally trained, even though I knew objectively that the designs worked, and had had the patterns properly tested and checked. And now, when I write stuff for The Career Girl I also often catch myself thinking ‘why would anyone read what you have to say?’ or ‘what makes you qualified to write about this?' when I'm writing about things I've experienced and learned along the way. No one can say I didn't experience those things, and I'm not forcing anyone to read my thoughts, so why do I worry? Imposter syndrome alert!
'Imposter syndrome' was first identified in 1978 by psychologists Pauline Rose Clance and Suzanne Imes. No surprise there that the people to pinpoint this phenomenon were women; it is thought that women are on the whole more likely to suffer from it than men. And let's face it – for centuries in western society, women, people of colour and other marginalised groups have been told, firmly, by society and even by the law, that they don't belong in certain spaces and roles, so it's hardly surprising that these are the groups amongst whom imposter syndrome is most prevalent – after all, we've got a millennium or more of ingrained outsider-ness to overcome.
Imposter syndrome tells you that you still don't belong – in your job, in your workplace, in your community, even in your friendship group or family. It convinces you that all of your achievements to date are the result, not of your hard work or talent, but of luck, coincidence and perhaps even 'happy misunderstandings'. You aren't actually up to the job, and sooner or later, you're going to be found out. It pays no attention to hard evidence of abilities, strengths, qualifications, popularity, riding roughshod over them straight to the front of your brain.
It's a issue for obvious reasons. It can stop you from speaking up or sharing your ideas for fear of exposing your ignorance. It means you avoid asking for help because again, you don't want to flag up any weakness or gaps in your knowledge, and also not taking due credit for your work, when given. It often manifests itself in women not applying for jobs unless they meet all the stated requirements – one of our followers admitted she hasn't applied for jobs she's fully qualified for simply because they are too 'senior'. Perhaps it even extends so far as to make you suspicious of and anxious about compliments, promotions, even relationships. All of these manifestations will have detrimental effects not only on you yourself, but also on people around you. Shockingly, one of our respondents said she has even quit jobs because she simply didn’t feel good enough to be in them - imagine the collective loss teams, projects and businesses must unknowingly experience thanks to imposter syndrome…
So here are some fixes I've used to help me fight against imposter syndrome:
For a start, it's important to try and work out just where your sense of being an imposter is coming from. For most people, it's the direct result of insecurities about who we are and what we can do. But in some cases, the imposter syndrome might actually be caused by something external – for example, if everyone in your workplace doesn't look like you (i.e. you're the only woman, or person of colour, or person with disabilities) or if your team makes you feel like an outsider through exclusionary activities (e.g. after work socialising with alcohol when you don't drink, or have caring responsibilities to get home to), then it's hardly surprising if you start to feel like an imposter.
Focus on your successes. Keep your CV and LinkedIn profile up-to-date with any achievements and perhaps even keep a list of positive comments and times when you've made a concrete contribution to a project's success. If you're self-employed, keep a note of positive feedback from customers and anyone else you work with. This reinforces your awareness of your abilities and gives you an immediate comeback to any niggling feelings of failure.
Accept that there will be times when you don't know the answer or what to do next, and that this is normal, not a sign of failure. But even if you have failed, remember that 'failure' is not a dead end, nor a permanent state, but simply a feature of progress. Stop focusing on the concept of failure and regard the situation instead as a learning opportunity. So you didn't get that job offer/promotion? Don't berate yourself for having the cheek to apply in the first place, but seek feedback if possible and look at what you might do differently next time. And acknowledge that, especially at the moment, opportunities might simply be harder to come by, and that's got absolutely nothing to do with your skillset!
Write down the thoughts you feel stem from imposter syndrome. Then imagine saying them to a friend or colleague. Would you be telling someone else that they're just not good enough? Try practising talking to yourself as you would to a friend, with encouragement and positive suggestions, rather than dismal forebodings. Stating things out loud often exposes their weak points.
Examine any external factors involved in your imposter syndrome and see if these can be improved. If your workplace or team set-up makes you feel excluded, speak to your manager or HR team if possible. Share your feelings with sympathetic coworkers – you'll almost certainly find you're not the only person feeling insecure.
Also, voice your fears to friends and family and listen, properly, to their rebuttals. One of our Instagram followers pointed out that it's much easier to let negative thoughts spiral out of control when working from home alone, so make extra effort to check in with others, share how you're feeling and perhaps even give them a boost, as they're probably feeling the same way too! Another follower advises making friends with people in similar roles, as you’ll quickly discover they share your feelings.
Remember: practice will lead to progress, so the more you push back against negative thoughts the easier it will become and the more you will be able to recognise the difference between being appropriately cautious, and succumbing to imposter syndrome. The goal ultimately is not to become impervious to self-doubt, but to recognise when it's the negative voice inside your head that's the real imposter.